Harvey Fierstein aka my greatest competition.

So for those of you who don't know, I have had an ongoing feud with Harvey Fierstein. He doesn't know it, but he has gotten every part i could ever play, and why you might ask...No it's not because I am a bear. Okay it might be because i am a bear. In all actuality it is
probably because i am a bear, but either way, I think it is because he's been talking shit about me. I don't know this for a fact, but I remember when i went in for my Fiddler on the Roof audition, Harvey had just left with an undeserved smile and I went in to sing my 16 bars, and I heard the casting agent snicker and say something like "I had heard there was a bear auditioning"...

Ever since, I know Harvey has been blackballing me. We were both up for Edna Turnblad, and i would have looked fierce in drag. Like "Tyra Banks" fierce, not like "eat your children" fierce.





And now for what my mother calls "my latest failure on the track to law school," I was going to be on Broadway. I was going to be in La Cage Aux Folles as the new Albin. I was prepping myself, going over all my old character analysis forms. I was going to be a star.......BUT, then guess who decides he wants to do it. Not Liza Minnelli! Harvey F-ing Fierstein. Bane of my existance. You win this time, but when i go out for the next Mother Superior in Sister Act, you need to stay away. There's only room for one big white bear on Broadway and it's going to be me!

~Broadway Bear